Timpanogos

Today was Timp Caves. Of course it kicked my butt. I'm not much of an incline hiker. Which makes me not much of a hiker. I loved the hike, I loved the caves, but I did not love the loud yuppie types with whom we went on the tour.

I am so over being tolerant of other people's ill behaved children. I think I used to enjoy being around them out of the awkward guilt that my children were the same. They weren't. They might have been bad, but I never had the feeling of entitlement yuppie parents seem to have. I never expected other people to be happy that my kids were being loud or running all over. I never ignored my kids until they were annoying other people.

I think I may be evolving into some type of misanthrope. This makes me sad. I love people. I look forward to talking to them and hearing their stories. Or, rather, I used to. Now I just want to set them on fire or push them down and stomp on their vapid faces.

I think part of my venom comes from the fact that I used to like people. Like the child attacked by the family dog grown up, I'm wary and unhappy in most of my dealings with them.

So, that at least, was fun. Because it reminded me of why Ed Abbey went into the desert. He did it to get paid, but also because people where a poison. The are a growth upon the land, a cancer. He did some of his best writing because he knew this. I don't have the incentive to join up with the rangers, so eventually I'll just make myself happy out in the nowheres with Liam. After that, a monastic life beckons. I thought up until now, I'd live in community. Now I'm thinking retreat or hermit. As much as I can.

But the caves were beautiful. And I made it all the way. My legs are becoming so sexy. Next time, I'll ask people to please just be quiet. Then I won't feel so ripped off at seeing something so breathtaking ruined by loud american tourists.